MMGB: And you thought you were dumb?

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant:  Leicester .

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues. What do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're . .?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So, who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC  MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What's the capital of  Italy?
Contestant:  France.
Trelinski:  France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant:  Paris.

BEACON RADIO, (Wolverhampton)
DJ Mark: For £10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

LINCOLNSHIRE FM PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant:  Barcelona .
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry; I don't know the names of any countries in  Spain .

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Q: What is the world's largest continent?
A: The Pacific

RICHARD AND JUDY (C4)
Presenter: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er. . .
Presenter: He makes bread. . .
Contestant: Err...
Presenter: He makes cakes . .
Contestant:  Kipling Street ?

BREAKFAST SHOW (RADIO 1)
Chris Moyles: Which 's' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?
Contestant: Ummm. . .
Moyles: It begins with 's' and rhymes with 'perm'.
Contestant: Shark.

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
O'Brien: How many kings of  England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth. . . er .. . . Three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO  BRISTOL)
Searle: In which European country is  Mount Etna ?
Caller:  Japan .
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er . . .  Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO  NEWCASTLE)
Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between  Egypt and  Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant:  Holland ?
Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant:  Iceland ?  Ireland ?
Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say  Israel ?
Contestant: No.

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and . . ?
Contestant: Jelly.

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: In traffic, what 'j' is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway?

QUIZMANIA (ITV)
Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with T.
Contestant: Doctor.
Scott: No, it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango.
Contestant: Oh, (pause) Doctor.

BIG QUIZ (LBC)
Gary King: Name the funny men who once entertained kings and queens at court.
Contestant: Lepers.

TALKSPORT
Andy Townsend: How many wheels does a tricycle have?
Caller: Two.
Townsend: The Beatles were known as the Fab...?
Caller: Five.

MAGIC 52 (NORTH-EAST ENGLAND)
Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?
Contestant: Erm...
Presenter: Well, let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964.
Contestant: 1965?

FAMILY FORTUNES
Presenter : Name a dangerous race?
Contestant :The Arabs.

Presenter : Name something that's red?
Contestant : My  Nan 's Cardigan.

Presenter : Name a bird with a long neck?
Contestant : Naomi Campbell.